


been here all along (so why can't you see?)

by caffeine101



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: 5+1 Things, Alternate Universe - Childhood Friends, Alternate Universe - Different First Meeting, Jealous Sherlock, M/M, Oblivious John, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Pining Sherlock Holmes, aka until where we see them in the show, as each chapter is posted, for sure, like they knew each other as 7 year olds and the story sticks with them until now, rated t because I know I won't resist the temptation to say fuck for long, so ig that would technically make it
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-26
Updated: 2019-12-22
Packaged: 2021-02-26 01:48:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,544
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21575539
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/caffeine101/pseuds/caffeine101
Summary: 5 times John Watson's heart belonged to someone else + 1 time it belonged to Sherlock.
Relationships: Sherlock Holmes/John Watson
Comments: 6
Kudos: 29





	1. she’ll never know your story like i do

**Author's Note:**

> so whumptober didn't work out lmao.
> 
> but I'm back (to this mostly dead fandom) and on a bigger taylor swift kick than ever. got two more sherlock fics lined up too but first I gotta see if I can actually finish this one.

Sherlock Holmes is seven years old. His best friend, John Watson, is also seven years old, although he is exactly five months and three days older than Sherlock. That’s okay, though, because Sherlock is much smarter than John. He tells this to John all the time (usually when he’s explaining something that John doesn’t understand to him), but John doesn’t seem to mind. The other kids call him mean names when Sherlock does that. John never has.

John is also Sherlock’s only friend, but Sherlock is not John’s only friend. This isn’t usually an issue, because Sherlock is John’s _best_ friend, and Sherlock can always drag John away from the other kids if he really needs to. Today, though, John is being particularly stubborn about staying where he is, and he isn’t even talking to anyone this time.

They are currently in Art, where they are supposed to be doing something with _hearts_ (except they’re not really hearts, because hearts don’t look like that. Sherlock had tried to explain this to the two girls opposite Sherlock and John at the table, Larissa and Ally, as Ally drew a heart, clearly for her mum on her birthday. He had even shown them a picture from his book, but this had only frightened them, and John had told him to put the book away before they got in trouble). It’s for some holiday called _Valentine’s Day_. Sherlock had assumed that John would have found this as inane (or dumb, as he would have said to John) as he did, but John was just as engrossed in his “heart” as Larissa and Ally were.

“John!” Sherlock had hissed at him, intent on complaining, but John had simply ignored him as he picked up construction paper and coloured pencils. 

Sherlock had allowed him twenty-five minutes and fifteen seconds of this, but now looking at the fungi in the sink and making faces at James two tables away to see how he would react was getting boring. “John!” he says, a little bit louder. John ignores him again. Sherlock pouts and pokes John over and over, repeating his name until John snaps at him.

“What?” 

“What are you doing?” 

“What do you mean, what am I doing? I’m decorating the heart-”

“Yes, but _why?_ Clearly, this _Valentine’s Day_ is a waste of time, I thought you of all people would have noticed that-”

“It’s not a waste of time!” John gets loud very suddenly, and everyone is looking at him. John doesn’t like people looking at him, Sherlock knows, and right on cue, he blushes a brilliant red as he notices. Sherlock wants to tell John that it doesn’t matter what all these people think, has told him before, but John persists in his embarrassment. Soon enough, everyone looks away, and John continues, quieter this time. “It’s not a waste. You get to tell all the people you like that you like them. Like family, and friends. And, other people. That you like.”

Sherlock tilts his head, considering. Shouldn’t people know that already? He says as much. “Don’t they already know you like them?”

“Well-” John struggles to find the words. “Yeah, but like, you get to make sure they know. Or tell people that. Don’t know. You know?”

Sherlock doesn’t know. It still doesn’t make sense, but most things everyone else does don’t. What is making even less sense is that John seems more embarrassed than usual. He’s stammering more than usual, too. This isn’t his John, but Sherlock doesn’t get a chance to ask (or deduce, like his annoying, unfortunately smarter big brother always tells him to do), because the teacher tells them it’s time to leave at that moment, and John, who clearly still hasn’t finished his heart, says, “Oh no!” as he hurriedly cleans up and carefully puts his heart away.

\---

Sherlock doesn’t think much more of it until he gets back home and hears the maid chattering about what her husband gets her every year for Valentine’s Day. The gardener that she is talking to responds with what his husband gets him every year. Even his mother, when he passes her on the way to his room, is on the phone with a florist about a bouquet for his father on Valentine’s day, of course.

Usually, Sherlock finds it mind-numbingly easy to ignore what everyone else is doing, even/especially his mum and dad, like when he refused to dress up for Halloween (until John came over, excited, and persuaded Sherlock that trick or treating would be fun), or when he found the Easter egg hunts to be too easy and sat up in his room (until John came up to his room, and Sherlock found that dazzling him with instantly finding the hiding locations to be suitable entertainment), or even something as mundane as using an umbrella when it’s raining (unless John is walking with him, because then he starts to shiver and it’s _dreadfully_ distracting).

Thinking back at all of these _John exceptions_ , he huffs, because it looks like this is going to be another one. He really is trying very hard to ignore all this gross _lovey-dovey_ nonsense, but all he can hear is John saying _”You get to tell all the people you like that you like them. Like family, and friends. And, other people. That you like.”_

That would mean the heart was for Sherlock, right? It clearly wasn’t for his bully of a sister, and John never really talked about his parents except to complain about how funny his dad smelled all the time and how his mummy seemed sad. John didn’t have any other friends that he would give a gift. Hence, it was for Sherlock.

And that meant Sherlock should do something for John too, right?

Sherlock huffed again as he went downstairs again, peering up at his mummy through his curls and saying, “I need construction paper, Mummy. And colours.” 

John was lucky Sherlock was willing to make so many exceptions for him, really.

\---

It is Valentine’s Day, and Sherlock has very carefully brought his _anatomically correct_ heart to school. John will appreciate the attention to detail, he hopes, because he had to ask _Mycroft_ to help. It was very unpleasant, with Mycroft looking down his big, fat nose at him the whole time.

He flounces into the room like normal, eyes automatically searching for John. They do not have much time before the teacher unpleasantly forces them quiet and into their seats. Sherlock would have no problem giving it to him during class, really, but John would, of course, prefer that they break no rules. 

He finds John easily enough, but John’s eyes don’t immediately come to meet his like they normally do. And he isn’t in his seat like he normally is, either. Instead, he is standing next to Ally, and he is holding out-

The heart that Sherlock assumed was for _him_. 

John’s face is as red as it was yesterday, but both of them are smiling, and Sherlock doesn’t like it. Surely John likes him better than he likes Ally? But then why would he give her the heart, and not him?

Suddenly, he doesn’t want to give John his _anatomically correct_ heart. Maybe he should give it to Larissa.

(Larissa doesn’t understand why or appreciate that isn’t a regularly-shaped heart.)

(John would have, he is sure.)


	2. thinkin' to myself, hey isn't this easy?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yall I'm back and it only took me a month.
> 
> all mistakes are mine I don't know how anything works.

Sherlock has known, ever since he had spent time around more than just Mycroft and their parents, that everyone is an idiot. After he had moved past thinking he was an idiot compared to Mycroft, it was easy to realize that whatever the intelligence gap was between Mycroft and himself, the gap was upwards of ten times larger between Sherlock and the rest of the idiots that contaminated the planet. 

He isn’t sure, however, that there is anyone _less_ intelligent than Sebastian Wilkes. Sherlock knows he is doing better than the rest of the school in math (obvious, he doesn’t need to take a peek at his report card to know that despite what Sebastian thinks) but when it comes to anything that _doesn’t_ have to do with math, it is hard to equivocate his intelligent to even a goldfish, because even a goldfish can do more than open its mouth and eyes dumbly when confronted with even a modicum of intelligence. 

Unfortunately, Sherlock (and John, of course) seems to be the only one that realizes that Sebastian has not yet evolved from _Hominoidea_ to _Homo sapien_ , so when Sebastian decides to torment Sherlock, there is little he can do against Sebastion and the rest of his blank-eyed lackeys. 

Today is no different. Sebastian had only just received his first failing chemistry grade (again, obvious) and had decided to take it out on Sherlock. Although Sherlock is still quite a bit taller than him, he is not taller than either of his friends, and he is definitely outnumbered. Still, he can give as good as he gets, especially since Sebastian’s verbal jabs leave something to be desired, even if his (mainly his goons’, really) punches do not.

“Hey, freak!” Sherlock rolls his eyes and keeps walking - after the first three times Sebastian had used the same nickname, it had lost its already minimal sting. “You, freak!”

Sherlock can already tell by the tone of his voice that Sebastian has something to prove this time, and will likely not let up until Sherlock acknowledges him. He makes sure that the sound of his heavy sigh carries back to the three behind him before calling back, “Yes?” without stopping his quick strides. 

He is forced into a sudden halt anyway when two of them catch up to him and smoothly place themselves into his way. They’re faster than their broad frames should be, swiftly shifting this way and that when Sherlock tries to swerve around them. Sherlock can already feel the impending bruise. (Bruises, plural, actually, first a ring around his upper arm when Sebastian holds him in place while he blows off steam via ranting at him, then a second one on his face when Sherlock irritates him to the breaking point). 

His first prediction is already coming true, as Sebastian reaches his hand forward, fingers already curling around his bicep in an attempt to keep him still, when a, “Hey!” comes from down the hall.

Sherlock would recognize that voice anywhere. It’s John.

Sure enough, when Sherlock turns around, John is glaring at the group of figures around him. He isn’t a very intimidating figure, considering he hasn’t grown nearly as much as Sherlock has, and is left at an unfortunate 1.7 meters. What is intimidating is his glare, promising fierce retribution to the one who dares lay a finger on Sherlock, and after what had happened last time, everyone knows that John can and will follow through on that threat, no matter how much trouble he ends up in afterwards.

The shorter of Sebstian’s minions - the one on the right stopping his path - is already shrinking back, the memory of what John had already done to him making him reluctant for a repeat performance. Sherlock resists the urge to laugh, but he does allow a thin smile. Sebastian releases him roughly, shoving Sherlock away as he glares right back at John.

It’s clear that the lot of them are going to back off, the shorter of Sebastian’s friends already out of arm’s length of Sherlock, and so he can’t resist one last jab. “What did you need, Sebastian?” He raises a single eyebrow in the smug way he knows Sebastian hates.

Sure enough, Sebastian’s left eye twitches, but John is still standing, arms crossed, at the end of the hall, watchful, and Sebastian still has the bruises from their last encounter. He doesn’t do much more than grit his teeth and force out, “Nothing,” before following his friends, making sure to hit his shoulder against Sherlock’s on the way out.

Sherlock can feel more than see John relaxing, hears John walk up to him and stays still just long enough for them to fall in step with each other before he resumes his walk to the exit. “What did he want this time?” John asks, holding no reservations that Sherlock might not know.

“First F in chemistry. Needed someone to take it out on,” Sherlock says, likewise not pretending that he doesn’t know. 

“Mm. Asshole.” 

“Indeed.”

They fall into an easy sort of silence as they leave the school campus behind them and begin walking to their respective destinations, in the same direction for most of the walk before they have to split. It has been the same route the both of them have taken since school began, and although they don’t always spend the entire walk talking, the companionable silence they almost always fall into is just as good. 

It’s odd. Sherlock, with almost everyone else in his life, has had to _be_ something. Be quieter, be nicer, be dumber, be smarter. With John, there isn’t any of that. John is the only one to accept Sherlock for Sherlock, and he can just . . . be. If it were up to Sherlock, he would be content to just _be_ with John for the rest of eternity. 

Unfortunately, it isn’t up to Sherlock, which is why they are stopped a quarter of the way through their walk by John’s _girlfriend._ (Even in his mind, Sherlock tries to inflict as much disgust into the word as possible, and he is possible of inflicting a _lot_ of disgust.)

“John!” she says, voice annoyingly high-pitched as she lays a kiss on John’s lips. John laughs into her lips and deepens the kiss, but only for a second, before pulling back and smiling at her.

“Veronica,” he says, smile on his face bright, and although Sherlock likes Veronica as little as it is possible to like someone and still tolerate them, he can never truly hate someone that manages to put that smile on John’s face. This is the only reason why he accepts their current dynamic - Sherlock and John and sometimes Veronica - rather than Sherlock’s ideal: Sherlock and John, period. 

He is also somewhat comforted by the fact that very rarely do high school relationships last (although that is immediately nulled by knowing that John is bound to settle down with someone eventually, if not his high school sweetheart, then another women that Sherlock will have to share John with). 

Veronica barely spares Sherlock a glance before she’s leaning closer, whispering something into John’s ear that makes both of them grin even wider. It would barely take any extra effort to listen in to what she is saying, but Sherlock really, _really_ doesn’t want to know (lest he fall even further into the disgustingly mundane feeling of _jealousy_ ) and so instead averts his eyes and ears. Thankfully, Veronica leaves quickly, this time with just a kiss to John’s cheek, and the two of them are alone again (as they should be). 

Sherlock wants to send a glare at Veronica’s retreating back, but her presence has left a small, soft smile on John’s face that Sherlock’s presence has never done, and so instead he settles for a simmering disappointment and a return to the comfortable silence of before.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> not sure how much I liked this one? but hey I actually have the rest of this planned out so I might as well release the next ones too.

**Author's Note:**

> not sure how well I did with the stream of consciousness of 7 y/o sherlock but I think I'm given some leeway considering this is 7 y/o _sherlock _. lemme know what you think and whether or not I should stop this endeavor immediately.__


End file.
